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How to Encourage Your Boss to Follow Through on Your Request in Dealing With the Bully
by Valerie Cade
You know you're right. This is a case of Bullying Behavior. Know that the boss you go to for intervention may not have the same needs as you.
The boss might be just as happy if he/she did not have to deal with this situation, and you could just "shoulder" the situation. Don't fall for this; you know this is not best.
The boss might encourage you to "buy more coffee, reach out". This is where you enlighten your boss with your detailed notes, showing that influence will not and has not worked.
Ask directly for their authoritative power and explain that this intervention/authority is the only approach that will work with someone who is not seeking a mutual win-win.
Be clear on what you want, so the boss has clarity in order to support you specifically. Don't leave it for the boss to try and figure this out - detail and help as much as you can.
Ask for this boss to do this by a certain date. Why wait? Yet the boss may put it off. Agree on when the boss will make the approach to the bully.
After the boss approaches the bully, monitor the bully's behavior and let the boss know the update.
If the behavior has gotten better - thank the boss! Bring them a coffee!
If the behavior has not changed - share this with the boss, and suggest the boss approach the bully again, making it clear what was expected.
You can offer to have a 3-way conversation where the boss brings the two of you together and fosters agreement through the boss' authority. Warn this boss that bullies may tend to make excuses, deny behavior, etc. - just be clear on outcomes.
Lastly, know that using this boss to help you is your right. Do not feel guilty; instead, encourage and support this boss to do what is right.
Question: Share your experience - what's happened to you in similar situations?
About the Author
Valerie Cade is a workplace bullying expert and author of Bully Free At Work. For more tips, articles, how-to's, and podcasts, visit THE resource to stop workplace bullying
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